Two men, a girl, and the color yellow

First, let's start with tonight's cheese. Camembert. And oooooh, the recipe I made with it. I mean, someone should marry me for this. I have other reasons too, smart, pretty, kind to animals, but this, this was a cheesy dish of heavenly bliss. You'll love me for it, Hell, I love myself for it!

The recipe will be at the bottom, you need the cheese, crescent rolls, mushrooms, butter, green onions, and bacon. Yummmmm. Bacon makes everything better. And the recommended wine, Pinot Noir went perfect!

Okay, on to the show...........
We start with our usual recap, beginning with meeting 25 handsome men. We see good dates, we see bad dates, we see crazy dates, we see cheesy dates, we see Justin and his girlfriend drama, Frank and his Frankespearan drama. It was a mid-summer's nightmare....well, this Juliet didn't drink the poison, and she certainly didn't fall on his sword (cause he bailed before the fantasy suite date). Hey, wasn't Romeo in love with someone else at the beginning of his play too??? Okay, let's move on from my limited knowledge of Shakespearean plays. (My drama teacher, Ms. Henry might be a little disappointed.)

On to the remaining 2 guys, Dinero-Roberto, and Cape Cod Chris. Time for them to meet the parental units in Bora Bora (yeah, I haven't used the phrase parental units since college, deal with it).

Now Ali takes a look back. She has had, wait for it..... an AMAZING time. Wearing her yellow, dealing with a two-timing, no, three-timing wrestler, more Frankespearen drama. However, I think her toughest challenge was Kasey, the crazy train. I mean, how did she NOT laugh in his face when he said "Jump in, stay awhile". Wait, she did laugh at that.

Roberto is first up to meet the family. He brings the required present. They never open it, who cares, he's Roberto! So it's Ali's Dad, mom, brother and sister. The brother and mom have on matching blues. Which distracts me. But I get back on track when the dad asked Roberto his favorite baseball team and Ali says "The Tiempa Blue Rays". Or maybe she meant blu-rays. Sigh. It is Tampa Bay. And they started as The Devil Rays, and are now just the Rays. After seeing how she held a bat, I'm not sure why I expected better.

Anyway, Roberto giggles, corrects her, and then her sister and brother drag him outside to have a "chat" with him. Ali tells her parents "he calms her down".
Me - Uh, can he make you stop with that stupid giggle of yours?
So mom has her chat with Roberto, she tells him the usual BS and says a sentence to him in Spanish. She she believes his heart is pure. Uh, you did not see them in the fantasy suite. I would NOT call that pure. HOT, yes. Pure, no.

Now it's Dad's turn. He asks about how Roberto feels about Ali. He hits a homer. Back when Roberto's dad asked Ali how she felt, well, she bunted. Ali, a bunt is... oh, forget it.

Ali's Dad gives his blessing. Of course he does. Who would turn down Rico Suave???
Now it's time to teach everyone how to salsa dance - Bailamos....let the rhythm take you over, bailamos....
Roberto gets ready to leave. The family loves him, he loves them, we all love each other... except for me and the construction crew outside my house working on the street when I am trying to sleep in. But that's another story.

Now it's time for Cape Cod Chris to meet the family. I bet the first thing she tells them his is from Massachusetts. (He has a basket of fruit for the gift, I would go w/wine)
Yep, I win that bet. They ask if he's from the East part or West part. I bemoan my lack of knowledge of geography, while I think, is Massachusetts big enough to have division between east and west? Sorry, but if you say West Texas, or East Texas, well, that could be an entire day apart, not, oh, say 20 minutes.

But back to our story. Obviously Ali never gave them the forewarning that his mother died, and Ali's poor mom stepped right in it. However, we then learn the following -
Chris's mom was a nurse. Ali's mom was a nurse. His dad used to teach. Ali's sister teaches, Ali's dad used to teach and Chris was high school teacher. So now we have teachers and nurses. So, one could get sick and learn geography. Perfect.
We hear the word "amazing" for the 100th time. I take another hit off my bottle of wine.

Another coincidence is Chris's dad grew up in Montreal, Ali's dad was born there. Hey, I went to Canada once too... Yes, Canadians, I know, it's a big country, blah, blah. It's still Canada.

Then they have a tearjerker conversation about his mom. Sniff. Glad I have Kleenex.
Now time for the conversations. Brother and sister get to go first. Her brother finally says one sentence. I was beginning to think the Phantom had returned. But this guy isn't as cool, and does not strike me as "stealthy" but the sister must have told him to keep his mouth shut. Is Stealthy even a word?
Chris rambles on to the sister and mute brother, the sister loves him. The brother is distracted by shiny objects.

Chris says "wicked amazing" and then goes out for the required dad talk. Summary - it goes as expected. Are you sure love her, yes, I want to marry her. Blah, Blah. I'm really not listening after the speech he gave to the sister and mute brother. I heard you the first time.

From there, they all put in their bathing suits and dive into the water. Lame.
They talk about how they both are from Massachusetts, and I really wonder how the hell they haven't met before, I mean isn't that state REALLY small? Yeah, yeah, I know, they have Boston.

Now it's the time for Ali to discuss both guys with the family. Rico Suave seems to have scored more points. The sister speaks for her and the brother again. He tries to talk, but she cuts him off, and takes over. The brother wonders if he should eat the fruit from the basket. But he's not sure if the sister will yell at him or not. They aren't very helpful as they come to the conclusion that both guys love her and both guys are great.

Now it's time for the down and dirty dates, I mean the ones that don't have the family around. Here she comes in yellow again. Is anyone else sick of her wearing yellow? They make out.
They jet ski.
Ali tells the camera "I really like to get on machines and go really fast.
Me - Snort.

Then they jump in the water with sting rays. He hopes it is safe. Uh, think, did ABC make you sign a waiver regarding sting rays? If, not you are good.
After frolicking and shrieking among the sting rays, they picnic on a beach, then it rains and they run out into the ocean. Good thing there wasn't any lightning. Just sayin', that would not have been safe!

Back at the hotel, Roberto lights the 100 candles the interns put out. Moves the champagne front and center. She arrives, and of course says, amazing.
Ali - "Before me, what was your type of girl?"
Roberto - "Not sure I have a type, I mean, they all chase after me, and I just pick one".
Me - Obviously sports knowledge is not a factor.
She tells him he is not her type, because he's too hot for her. We all agree with that. However, they both think each the other is AMAZING and they make out. He gives her a present. I'm sure an intern made it, and then he signed it. He reads it to her. She giggles. We all take a collective drink. He is soooo Dinero.

Now Chris gets ready for his date. His shirt doesn't match his shorts. He says he can't wait to hear her laugh. Really? It annoys the crap out of me, but I think I've mentioned that. He tells the camera how in love he is with her. Every woman watching hopes he is the next Bachelor.

Ali arrives. Tells him it has been a crazy week. She sits down for a serious talk. I don't see this ending well. She starts with how wonderful he is. Um, But. Oh, we've all seen it before, and know what's coming. She gently dumps him. She's such a rule-breaker. Chris is heart broken. Single women in the Northeast United States start googling his address. He thanks her for being honest. They cry and hug. She leaves and wanders down to the beach to contemplate serious things. Like OMG, should I have my bridesmaids wear yellow at my Robert-o wedding-o?

Then a beautiful rainbow arrives. It's Chris's mom telling him everything is going to be okay. It is a beautiful rainbow, and I don't have the heart to make fun of that.

Anyway, Chris cries over his lack of fashion sense, and packs his stuff and leaves on a boat. Is it just me, or have we seen a whole lot of comings and goings ON A BOAT?

Now Ali prepares for the final rose ceremony. She is sure of Roberto, she's not sure why he'd pick her, but she sure hopes he does. We aren't sure either, but he is now meeting with the diamond man. So apparently he is sure too. I will say I like their chances more than Jake and Vienna's. He picks out a ring, and wow, that ring is beautiful. I'm guessing he doesn't have to pay for it either, and that can't hurt. We get to see Roberto getting ready, including a shot of him in the shower. Now, what woman did NOT hit the pause/rewind a couple of times on that scene?

Ali gets dressed up, in shocker, a YELLOW evening gown. Roberto has on a suit and tie. Hey, who is the guy that helped Ali get dressed?

So here comes Roberto, ON A BOAT. She's nervous. He's sweating. Probably because he's wearing a suit, and has to walk up hundreds of stairs to get there.
He then tells her how he feels, she is dying to tell him she all ready sent Chris home. As much as Ali annoys me, even I had to say "aaawwwwww" after his speech. She kisses him, and I'm sure he has seen his rose sitting there. She finally gets to tell him that Cape Cod Chris is back in Cape Cod.

Summary - they are in love. And he asks her to marry him. She says yes. Again, Awwwwww. It's a fairy tale. Oh, and the sound editors added in Can You feel the love and we remember him in the Lion King.

Speaking of fairy tales, let me tell you about my recipe. Let's call them Delicious Cheesy Puffs.

Lay out the crescent rolls, but leave in the rectangular shape and press the seam together. Put in a piece of the Camembert cheese. Top with mushrooms sauteed in a little butter. Top with bacon pieces and green onions. Bake. Oh, snap.
One more tip - trust you crescent roll. I probably could have added more bacon and mushrooms but was worried about it holding it all in. Just be careful with the green onions. The cheese is very mild, and the onions make a fantastic opposite taste, but if you use too much of the green onions, it will over power the cheese.
The wine - 2007 Pinot Noir (label Chevriot). Very fruity, hint of cheery. Went PERFECT with this cheese. Also, if you don't feel like cooking, this cheese needs to be served room temperature - like Brie.

Hope you enjoy the recipe and my blog!
See you for the Bachelor Pad.